These seem to be words that I say more and more frequently. The travel bug has burrowed deep in my heart and will not let me rest until I have flown off to see some distant land. And this week it's off to San Francisco for a few days to explore and visit dear friends that relocated there a few months ago.
I think it was Hawaii that first exposed me to the travel bug a little over a year and a half ago. Other than a few trips across the Mexican border, Hawaii was the most foreign place I had ever been to. It may be one of the United States of America but as THE most remote place in the world (about 2500 miles from the nearest continent) it felt like another planet. I loved the thrill of being someplace so new and exotic. And since that first trip to Hawaii I have been averaging about a trip (by plane) every three months. And yes folks, that is all travel for pleasure!! Of course, all of my destinations are with in the US and to visit friends that scattered out all over the country. I don't want you all to think I am sitting on a goldmine or anything. I have just made travel, exploration and adventure a big priority in my life these days.
Next summer I do plan to take a sabbatical between quitting work and returning to school for the soul purpose of travel. I am invigorated and inspired by travel and new cultures. I am planning to wander about the Mediterranean and see what I see, mainly in Italy and Greece. I have been storing up airline miles like a squirrel hording nuts for the winter. Now it's time to cash them in and have the biggest adventure of my life.
Bono sang, "I still haven't found what I'm looking for." And maybe that is why I travel, in part. But the more I travel, the more I find that there is so much more worth looking for than I ever imagined. I will leave it to others wiser and more well travelled than my self to give a few more reasons to take to the roads, the seas, the skies and see what other wonders we might discover.
“The world is a book and those who do not travel read only one page.” - St. Augustine
“The journey not the arrival matters.” - T. S. Eliot
“Perhaps travel cannot prevent bigotry, but by demonstrating that all peoples cry, laugh, eat, worry, and die, it can introduce the idea that if we try and understand each other, we may even become friends.” - Maya Angelou
“All journeys have secret destinations of which the traveler is unaware.” - Martin Buber
Wednesday, September 02, 2009
Tuesday, September 01, 2009
Life has been a whirlwind of activity lately. The last 6 months or so have been filled to the brim with travels all over the US. Celebrations for birthdays, engagements, and more. Outings to take advantage of all the lovely weather we had this summer in Seattle. Beginning new journeys toward the fulfillment of new dreams.It has all be wonderful!! Even the challenges and the stretching have been welcome change.
Now, all of the sudden, I look at the calendar and I see that is has some how become September 1st. Where has the time gone?
I am a little weary, but in the best way possible, at the moment. I think today I will simply say hello and let you know that I am still here. Still journeying through life and seeking out new things to do and see and be. Soon I will give a few more specifics on my journey of late. Till then I hope you are well and enjoying your journey!!
Monday, July 06, 2009
Where I've been and Where I Am Going
The last few months have been a whirlwind of activity and in these first few days of July I have been enjoying the chance to breath again. So much so that I may or may not have spent the entire day in my pajamas yesterday! :)
I have been charging full speed ahead on my journey toward a Master's in Social Work. With applications not due till January-March I have been focusing my energy on getting experience in the field of social work. Before school ended for the summer I was working with an after school program through the YMCA. It was great be working with youth again and I will be happy to return to that work in the fall. I have also been jumping in to a few different roles with Habitat for Humanity's Seattle affiliate. Along with getting dirty on the build sites, I have been working on the Family Support Team and will be working as a liaison between the habitat families and the home owner's association that they will be a part of. Since most of the families are immigrant and refugee families there are language and cultural barriers that make it hard for them to understand some of the rules. I'll be walking with them to help them understand and encourage them to get involved. I know that it will be a tremendous opportunity to grow and learn. Whether at the Y or Habitat I have been pushed outside my comfort zone and into uncharted waters, but I am finding it to be exhilarating and a complete confirmation that I am heading in the right direction.
And of course, May and especially June are crazy months for work. I spent many extra hours at the office trying to keep up with the high volume of work. There is still much work to be done for the close of the school year but all the time sensitive stuff is out of the way. It is nice to feel the pressure lifting.
Now July is here and there is lots of fun and travel on the schedule for the rest of the summer. Trips to Huntington Beach, Denver, and San Francisco before the summer ends. Sunshine and good friends to enjoy. I will try to spend a little time prepping for the GRE, which I plan to take this fall. And of course more time to breathe and dream.
I have been charging full speed ahead on my journey toward a Master's in Social Work. With applications not due till January-March I have been focusing my energy on getting experience in the field of social work. Before school ended for the summer I was working with an after school program through the YMCA. It was great be working with youth again and I will be happy to return to that work in the fall. I have also been jumping in to a few different roles with Habitat for Humanity's Seattle affiliate. Along with getting dirty on the build sites, I have been working on the Family Support Team and will be working as a liaison between the habitat families and the home owner's association that they will be a part of. Since most of the families are immigrant and refugee families there are language and cultural barriers that make it hard for them to understand some of the rules. I'll be walking with them to help them understand and encourage them to get involved. I know that it will be a tremendous opportunity to grow and learn. Whether at the Y or Habitat I have been pushed outside my comfort zone and into uncharted waters, but I am finding it to be exhilarating and a complete confirmation that I am heading in the right direction.
And of course, May and especially June are crazy months for work. I spent many extra hours at the office trying to keep up with the high volume of work. There is still much work to be done for the close of the school year but all the time sensitive stuff is out of the way. It is nice to feel the pressure lifting.
Now July is here and there is lots of fun and travel on the schedule for the rest of the summer. Trips to Huntington Beach, Denver, and San Francisco before the summer ends. Sunshine and good friends to enjoy. I will try to spend a little time prepping for the GRE, which I plan to take this fall. And of course more time to breathe and dream.
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
Back to Grey
After a few days of glorious sun the sky has turned back to grey again and the clouds are watering the earth. This change in the weather seems fitting as so many in my life are struggling right now. Illness seems to be touching so many right now that I am afraid to pick up the phone or read my latest emails.
Today a good friend's mother is in surgery to have a brain tumor removed. My grandmother was given the diagnoses of breast cancer one week ago. Another friend has a nephew, less than a year old, that has been in and out of the hospital over the last several month with a mysterious illness the doctors can't seem to fix or understand. Another friend's mom is in an assisted living home after MS and other complications have made home care impossible. A coworker traveled home to Michigan to be a support to her friend whose mother was killed over the weekend after being hit by a truck. My boss called this morning from the hospital after her father was taken in this morning (not sure why).
Last night a group of friends gathered to spend sometime praying over many of these things. In the face of so much illness and suffering it is hard to know of anything else to do but pray. We read some scripture before we prayed and one passage in particular weighed heavy on my heart, it was James 5:13-18.
Is anyone suffering? Yes. Is anyone cheerful? Probably. Is anyone sick? Too many. So all we can do is pray. And perhaps in the rain that falls there may be some answers, some healing, some peace and some comfort.
Today a good friend's mother is in surgery to have a brain tumor removed. My grandmother was given the diagnoses of breast cancer one week ago. Another friend has a nephew, less than a year old, that has been in and out of the hospital over the last several month with a mysterious illness the doctors can't seem to fix or understand. Another friend's mom is in an assisted living home after MS and other complications have made home care impossible. A coworker traveled home to Michigan to be a support to her friend whose mother was killed over the weekend after being hit by a truck. My boss called this morning from the hospital after her father was taken in this morning (not sure why).
Last night a group of friends gathered to spend sometime praying over many of these things. In the face of so much illness and suffering it is hard to know of anything else to do but pray. We read some scripture before we prayed and one passage in particular weighed heavy on my heart, it was James 5:13-18.
Is anyone among you suffering? Let him pray. Is anyone cheerful? Let him sing praise. Is anyone among you sick? Let him call for the elders of the church, and let them pray over him, anointing him with oil in the name of the Lord. And the prayer of faith will save the one who is sick, and the Lord will raise him up. And if he has committed sins, he will be forgiven. Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working. Elijah was a man with a nature like ours, and he prayed fervently that it might not rain, and for three years and six months it did not rain on the earth. Then he prayed again, and heaven gave rain, and the earth bore its fruit.
Is anyone suffering? Yes. Is anyone cheerful? Probably. Is anyone sick? Too many. So all we can do is pray. And perhaps in the rain that falls there may be some answers, some healing, some peace and some comfort.
Monday, April 20, 2009
Sunshine
Today the sun is shining and the air is warm. These are my kind of days. And in this sun induced bliss I think of the John Denver song "Sunshine On My Shoulders..."
I hope you too are enjoying the warmth of spring today!!
Sunshine on my shoulders makes me happy
Sunshine in my eyes can make me cry
Sunshine on the water looks so lovely
Sunshine almost always makes me high
If I had a day that I could give you
Id give to you a day just like today
If I had a song that I could sing for you
Id sing a song to make you feel this way
Sunshine on my shoulders makes me happy
Sunshine in my eyes can make me cry
Sunshine on the water looks so lovely
Sunshine almost always makes me high
If I had a tale that I could tell you
Id tell a tale sure to make you smile
If I had a wish that I could wish for you
Id make a wish for sunshine all the while
Sunshine on my shoulders makes me happy
Sunshine in my eyes can make me cry
Sunshine on the water looks so lovely
Sunshine almost always makes me high
Sunshine almost all the time makes me high
Sunshine almost always
I hope you too are enjoying the warmth of spring today!!
Monday, April 13, 2009
A Life In Terms of Water
I just filled up my water bottle and I am enjoying the refreshment of this cool drink.
Moments earlier I was washing off my dish from lunch with water from the kitchen sick at work and loaded others in the dishwasher to be cleaned with more water.
My home and work both sit about about 100 yards each from a body of freshwater and I cross a bridge over it 2 times a day to get from one to the other.
In my home I have two sinks, a shower, and a toilet all with a never ending supply of water. Plus access to another community sink and washing machine in the basement, plus a number of water spigots outside the building.
Even my very being, my physical body is made of around 55% water.
In the last 24 hours or so I have been thinking a lot about water. Mostly in response to the new Spilling Hope project launched this Easter Sunday at Bethany Community Church. There are people all over this earth dying all because they do not have access to safe drinking water and here I am with more clean, safe water at my figure tips than I could ever possibly need or want.
So for the next 50 days I will step up the the challenge of the Spilling Hope project. Live Simply. Give generously. Change lives. I will cut out some of the excess in my life and set aside that money to help build wells in Uganda that will bring clean, safe water to thousands. Also I will say a prayer for those that are walking the earth at that moment carrying the heavy burden of a 40 lb. water jug everytime a fill a glass of water, wash my hands, do the laundry, or any other task that uses even a drop of water.
I hope you'll take the time to learn more about the global Water Crisis and consider how you can take action by Spilling Hope.
Moments earlier I was washing off my dish from lunch with water from the kitchen sick at work and loaded others in the dishwasher to be cleaned with more water.
My home and work both sit about about 100 yards each from a body of freshwater and I cross a bridge over it 2 times a day to get from one to the other.
In my home I have two sinks, a shower, and a toilet all with a never ending supply of water. Plus access to another community sink and washing machine in the basement, plus a number of water spigots outside the building.
Even my very being, my physical body is made of around 55% water.
In the last 24 hours or so I have been thinking a lot about water. Mostly in response to the new Spilling Hope project launched this Easter Sunday at Bethany Community Church. There are people all over this earth dying all because they do not have access to safe drinking water and here I am with more clean, safe water at my figure tips than I could ever possibly need or want.
So for the next 50 days I will step up the the challenge of the Spilling Hope project. Live Simply. Give generously. Change lives. I will cut out some of the excess in my life and set aside that money to help build wells in Uganda that will bring clean, safe water to thousands. Also I will say a prayer for those that are walking the earth at that moment carrying the heavy burden of a 40 lb. water jug everytime a fill a glass of water, wash my hands, do the laundry, or any other task that uses even a drop of water.
I hope you'll take the time to learn more about the global Water Crisis and consider how you can take action by Spilling Hope.
Friday, February 13, 2009
Signs and Other Good Things
Yesterday at work I received a box of paperwork from an instructor that needed to be placed in candidate files. The arrival of the box was nothing special but the box itself possessed a feature that delighted my heart. The box was hand delivered and unsealed, but the packing tape from it's previous purpose wasn't your standard clear stuff so it caught my eye. It had hibiscus flowers printed on it and the words "Hilo Hattie's," the name of a Hawaiian gift shop. I then looked at the old shipping label. The box was originally sent from Honolulu to someone other that the person who sent it on to me. A little piece of Hawaii found it's way to me through at least 3 degrees of separation. I took it as a sign.
A sign of what? That's not exactly clear. But things like this seem too perfect to be mere coincidence. Ever since my last trip in November all the signs seem to confirm that the next turn my life will take leads to Hawaii. It's such a huge life change and that can be a scary thing. But God seems to be placing signs all along the way that are leading me to Hawaii and telling me that life there will be good.
A cardboard box is hardly a sign significant enough to uproot an entire life. There have been other, larger signs too. A friendship formed with a wonderful girl on my last trip. Someone who has offered encouragement, advise, and a place to stay two weeks from now as I make a practice run at life on the Island. Reconnecting with two dear friends from California days that now live on Oahu, also offering me a place to stay for part of my next visit. I will go to church with them and meet their community, hopefully creating more connections that can carry over to the time when I call Oahu home. Another old friend I haven't seen in 12 years finding me on Facebook who months ago relocated to Oahu. A college friend whose life seems to be steering her back to Hawaii and in need of someone to live with and share expenses. I think I know someone who might fit the bill.
There is already a community of people in Hawaii that have reached out to me with so much hospitality and friendship. People who offer such wonderful support and needed resources to me as I make my decision about moving. I am thankful that God has brought each of these people into my life at such a pivotal moment. It makes the decision so much easier, so much clearer.
I am excited to see how my trip plays out in a few weeks. I think a lot of great and important conversations will happen. I am excited to see what other wonderful surprises God has up his sleeve.
A sign of what? That's not exactly clear. But things like this seem too perfect to be mere coincidence. Ever since my last trip in November all the signs seem to confirm that the next turn my life will take leads to Hawaii. It's such a huge life change and that can be a scary thing. But God seems to be placing signs all along the way that are leading me to Hawaii and telling me that life there will be good.
A cardboard box is hardly a sign significant enough to uproot an entire life. There have been other, larger signs too. A friendship formed with a wonderful girl on my last trip. Someone who has offered encouragement, advise, and a place to stay two weeks from now as I make a practice run at life on the Island. Reconnecting with two dear friends from California days that now live on Oahu, also offering me a place to stay for part of my next visit. I will go to church with them and meet their community, hopefully creating more connections that can carry over to the time when I call Oahu home. Another old friend I haven't seen in 12 years finding me on Facebook who months ago relocated to Oahu. A college friend whose life seems to be steering her back to Hawaii and in need of someone to live with and share expenses. I think I know someone who might fit the bill.
There is already a community of people in Hawaii that have reached out to me with so much hospitality and friendship. People who offer such wonderful support and needed resources to me as I make my decision about moving. I am thankful that God has brought each of these people into my life at such a pivotal moment. It makes the decision so much easier, so much clearer.
I am excited to see how my trip plays out in a few weeks. I think a lot of great and important conversations will happen. I am excited to see what other wonderful surprises God has up his sleeve.
Friday, February 06, 2009
When Reality Sets In
For months now all the news seems to to be focused on one thing, the economy. While all the news is hard to ignore I haven't really felt any of the sting of the current crisis in my personal life. When you live is a big city with new construction going on all over and new businesses setting up shop in these new structures it can be hard to believe just how bad things really are. But than I turn on the TV or read the headlines and all of them say the same thing. Another bank going under, another business laying off thousands, and on and on. The future looks uncertain in so many way.
Before today the only person I knew personally to be effected by this economic down turn was my mom. She works as a florist part-time, just to have a little extra money for shopping and fun. The shop were she works has been struggling to bring in the kind of revenue they used to. After all, who buy flowers when funds for even the necessities are low? My mom's employer cut back her hours to make up for the down turn. Thankfully my dad has a well paying job that can support a comfortable life on its own so it hasn't been too detrimental.
Than this morning I got an email from a dear friend of mine that was laid off from her job last night. This is the first person that I have known to lose her job as a direct result of the economy. While she has a supportive family and her fiance has work to support them for the time being there is still a lot of fear about the future. She mentioned a job fair that she went to recently and a whopping 1200 people showed up for 125 job opening and that was only on day one of a two day fair. With so many others in the same place and more being laid off daily it is hard to find a word that best describes the challenge of finding work these days.
So today I feel a mix of emotions. I feel sorry for the struggle my friend now finds herself in (not to mention the millions of other Americans there with her). I feel thankful that I have a job that seems to be secure enough to last till the economy starts to climb again. I am a bit worried about what the future holds when all the sources seem to agree that we still haven't hit the bottom yet. I am hopeful that our new president has the vision, passion, and wisdom to lead us to better days. I am inspired to do what I can to help those that need it, after all ones luck could change at any moment in times like these and I would want others to be there for me.
So lets take care of each other. And we will make it through, hopefully better for it.
Before today the only person I knew personally to be effected by this economic down turn was my mom. She works as a florist part-time, just to have a little extra money for shopping and fun. The shop were she works has been struggling to bring in the kind of revenue they used to. After all, who buy flowers when funds for even the necessities are low? My mom's employer cut back her hours to make up for the down turn. Thankfully my dad has a well paying job that can support a comfortable life on its own so it hasn't been too detrimental.
Than this morning I got an email from a dear friend of mine that was laid off from her job last night. This is the first person that I have known to lose her job as a direct result of the economy. While she has a supportive family and her fiance has work to support them for the time being there is still a lot of fear about the future. She mentioned a job fair that she went to recently and a whopping 1200 people showed up for 125 job opening and that was only on day one of a two day fair. With so many others in the same place and more being laid off daily it is hard to find a word that best describes the challenge of finding work these days.
So today I feel a mix of emotions. I feel sorry for the struggle my friend now finds herself in (not to mention the millions of other Americans there with her). I feel thankful that I have a job that seems to be secure enough to last till the economy starts to climb again. I am a bit worried about what the future holds when all the sources seem to agree that we still haven't hit the bottom yet. I am hopeful that our new president has the vision, passion, and wisdom to lead us to better days. I am inspired to do what I can to help those that need it, after all ones luck could change at any moment in times like these and I would want others to be there for me.
So lets take care of each other. And we will make it through, hopefully better for it.
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
Up to the Mountain
I am still reveling in the joy of yesterday. A proud day for America. A day that marked the end of an old era and the beginning of a new. On January 20th, 2009 I watched through blurry, tear-filled eyes as Barak Hussein Obama was sworn in as the first African American President of the United States of America. It is hard to express the emotions of that moment. Hope and pride welling up inside. 2oo plus year of our country's history, full of moments that made it all possible, running through my mind. Obama's hand resting on Abraham Lincoln's bible. Millions gathered in Washington and billions more in front of TV's, computer screens and radios around the world experiencing history together. I don't know if I have ever seen my country so united.
It seemed so fitting, like God predestined it to be, that Obama would be sworn in on the day after the celebration of Martin Luther King Jr's life and legacy. Without MLK I am certain that this day would still be a long way off. While many had the words of King's "I have a Dream" speech ringing in their ears yesterday I was thinking of a different speech. Just one day before he was assassinated Martin Luther King Jr had this to say...
For so many Americans the floodgates of possibilities opened up for them yesterday, because of the long line of men and women, including MLK and culminating with Barak Obama, who believed that America was truly the land where all men are created equal.
A favorite musician of mine, Patty Griffin, wrote a song in tribute to MLK and his "I've been to the mountaintop" speech. The melody has been playing through my head for last few days now. Black or white, we could all use this kind of faith that God can and will make good on his promises. As we journey ahead into uncertain times we need great hope that we can persevere. Both King and Obama said that there would be dark days ahead, but both men remind us that we will get to the other side. The question of if has now been shattered. The only question left is when.
It seemed so fitting, like God predestined it to be, that Obama would be sworn in on the day after the celebration of Martin Luther King Jr's life and legacy. Without MLK I am certain that this day would still be a long way off. While many had the words of King's "I have a Dream" speech ringing in their ears yesterday I was thinking of a different speech. Just one day before he was assassinated Martin Luther King Jr had this to say...
Well, I don't know what will happen now. We've got some difficult days ahead. But it doesn't matter with me now. Because I've been to the mountaintop. And I don't mind. Like anybody, I would like to live a long life. Longevity has its place. But I'm not concerned about that now. I just want to do God's will. And He's allowed me to go up to the mountain. And I've looked over. And I've seen the promised land. I may not get there with you. But I want you to know tonight, that we, as a people, will get to the promised land. And I'm happy, tonight. I'm not worried about anything. I'm not fearing any man. Mine eyes have seen the glory of the coming of the Lord.
For so many Americans the floodgates of possibilities opened up for them yesterday, because of the long line of men and women, including MLK and culminating with Barak Obama, who believed that America was truly the land where all men are created equal.
A favorite musician of mine, Patty Griffin, wrote a song in tribute to MLK and his "I've been to the mountaintop" speech. The melody has been playing through my head for last few days now. Black or white, we could all use this kind of faith that God can and will make good on his promises. As we journey ahead into uncertain times we need great hope that we can persevere. Both King and Obama said that there would be dark days ahead, but both men remind us that we will get to the other side. The question of if has now been shattered. The only question left is when.
"Up To The Mountain (MLK Song)"
I went up to the mountain because you asked me to
Up over the clouds to where the sky was blue
I could see all around me everywhere
I could see all around me everywhere
Sometimes I feel like I've never been nothing but tired
And I'll be walking till the day I expire
Sometimes I lay down, no more can I do
But then I go on again because you ask me to
Some days I look down afraid I will fall
And though the sun shines I see nothing at all
Then I hear your sweet voice, oh
Oh, come and then go, come and then go
Telling me softly You love me so
The peaceful valley just over the mountain
The peaceful valley, few come to know
I may never get there ever in this lifetime
But sooner or later it's there I will go
Sooner or later it's there I will go
Friday, January 16, 2009
Thinking of Hawaii
It is a lazy Friday with the luxury of time for day dreaming. And that usually means I am thinking about Hawaii, wondering what my life could be like there. I think I mentioned before that the biggest concern in leaving Seattle is finding the same kind of community and friendships that I have known here. I feel lucky to already have a few friends there (plus the possibilty of adding to that number on my upcoming trip in only 43 days). But still I don't want to cling to those few people for community. I have started looking into ways to get involved in the community and meet people once I am kama`aina (that's means resident in Hawaiian).I have recently signed on to start volunteering with Habitat for Humanity here in Seattle and plan to continue with that in Hawaii at the Honolulu chapter. I have also looked at getting involved with the Surfrider Foundation. They have beach clean up days and other events. It seems fitting to really do what I can to be a good steward of the ocean since I know it will be the source of so much of my fun and adventure on Oahu. Another amazing organization I found is Spirit Sessions. It's a surfing outreach program for at-risk youth. I will need to brush up on my surfing skills a bit before jumping in there but it sounds like a really amazing program. I have also started searching for churches in the Honolulu area. I will be there one Sunday in March so maybe I'll be able to visit one.
All of these things get me excited about the possibilities of a new life in Hawaii. The one time in my life that I made a major move across statelines was for school. While it was still a little scary and mysterious so many things that I needed were built in. A purpose and community all part of the package. But now I am planning a move with no real aim except to start a new life, start fresh. I am not moving for a job or a relationship. I guess, simply put, I am moving because I can. For a while now I have been hearing God speak the same words over and over again. "Stop waiting for the life you want and start living the life you have." I sometimes I find myself a bit ashamed of my life. Not because of things I do, but all the things I don't. I want to take advantage of all the blessing of being where I am in my life. I don't want to miss an opportunity to grow and become more complete. I don't want to pass up an open door in the hopes that something better will come along. And Hawaii seems to be the open door right now.
Thursday, January 08, 2009
A Good Word and An Honest Response
This past Sunday, at Bethany Community Church, Richard had a very good word for us all. As the first Sunday of a new year it was a look at establishing some new ways. Richard talked about 3 different areas to cultivate in our spiritual lives; the way we steward our relationship with the Holy Spirit, the way we steward the talents God has given us, and the way we steward the "least of these" around us. As I have spent some time pondering these things the last few days I find myself struggling a bit at how to take these lessons and live them.
I have always struggled with the first point, my relationship with the Holy Spirit. I am hopelessly human and therefore I cling to tangible things. It is hard to devote myself to a thing I cannot see or touch or hear in a physical way. I know that prayer and communion with God is a thing I need desperately. And I have tasted the amazing fruits that can come from spending time there. But the fruit comes only through keeping present with God through it all, including the silent waiting. Spending time with God is not like spending time with a friend in the physical world. There are no hugs, no nods of agreement. Well maybe there are. Maybe He nods in the movement of the trees in the wind and hugs us with the warm colors of a sunset. I need to keep mindful that God's ways are not like ours and learn better how to experience the ways that he does respond. I need to learn the discipline of prayer and silence.
I struggle too, though perhaps a little less, with the issue of my talents. Any success I have had with talents has come because of their tangibility. These are the things I can do, make and say. My talents take physical shape. But then there is the question...what are my talents? What are the unique gifts that God has placed on me so that I may be a gift to the world? There are some areas that I have discovered my talents and shared them without fear or hesitation. Hospitality would one talent I am happy to invest. Then there are other areas that have all the signs of a talent, yet I am terrified to place them out in the light for all too see and judge. My music has always been a source of private comfort, but public terror. Perhaps because it is a more vulnerable expression of my inmost self and the thought of not being good enough in the eyes of another cuts deep. I need to learn to let go of the fear and share freely the gifts that have been given to me so freely.
And lastly the way I interact with the world around me, the world in need. More and more the needs grow. More and more my heart softens to the plight of those less fortunate, of whom the number is too great. But still my actions are severely deficient in comparison to my capabilities. Living in an urban setting there is no shortage of people in need that cross my path each day. So often I walk around with my eyes fixed on the ground and my mind fixed inwardly on my own wants and needs that I miss the opportunities that abound. There are simple things that I can do that don't require a huge shift in the way I live. To keep a few granola bars in my car to give to the homeless at the intersection on the way home from work. To help someone struggling with a heavy load by carrying a bag or two. I need to learn to look out into the world, away from myself, and see the needs of others and do what I can to meet them.
While it is good to think about such things it is my hope that as I journey ahead that these thoughts will make way into action. And that those actions will be a blessing to God and to the world!
I have always struggled with the first point, my relationship with the Holy Spirit. I am hopelessly human and therefore I cling to tangible things. It is hard to devote myself to a thing I cannot see or touch or hear in a physical way. I know that prayer and communion with God is a thing I need desperately. And I have tasted the amazing fruits that can come from spending time there. But the fruit comes only through keeping present with God through it all, including the silent waiting. Spending time with God is not like spending time with a friend in the physical world. There are no hugs, no nods of agreement. Well maybe there are. Maybe He nods in the movement of the trees in the wind and hugs us with the warm colors of a sunset. I need to keep mindful that God's ways are not like ours and learn better how to experience the ways that he does respond. I need to learn the discipline of prayer and silence.
I struggle too, though perhaps a little less, with the issue of my talents. Any success I have had with talents has come because of their tangibility. These are the things I can do, make and say. My talents take physical shape. But then there is the question...what are my talents? What are the unique gifts that God has placed on me so that I may be a gift to the world? There are some areas that I have discovered my talents and shared them without fear or hesitation. Hospitality would one talent I am happy to invest. Then there are other areas that have all the signs of a talent, yet I am terrified to place them out in the light for all too see and judge. My music has always been a source of private comfort, but public terror. Perhaps because it is a more vulnerable expression of my inmost self and the thought of not being good enough in the eyes of another cuts deep. I need to learn to let go of the fear and share freely the gifts that have been given to me so freely.
And lastly the way I interact with the world around me, the world in need. More and more the needs grow. More and more my heart softens to the plight of those less fortunate, of whom the number is too great. But still my actions are severely deficient in comparison to my capabilities. Living in an urban setting there is no shortage of people in need that cross my path each day. So often I walk around with my eyes fixed on the ground and my mind fixed inwardly on my own wants and needs that I miss the opportunities that abound. There are simple things that I can do that don't require a huge shift in the way I live. To keep a few granola bars in my car to give to the homeless at the intersection on the way home from work. To help someone struggling with a heavy load by carrying a bag or two. I need to learn to look out into the world, away from myself, and see the needs of others and do what I can to meet them.
While it is good to think about such things it is my hope that as I journey ahead that these thoughts will make way into action. And that those actions will be a blessing to God and to the world!
Friday, January 02, 2009
The Beginning of a Year of Change
It is January again! 2009! I can hardly believe that another fresh, new year is upon us. They seem to pass so quickly. And as I get used to the act of writing 09 in the date I have been thinking about how I want to spend this year. It looks as if it will be a year of great change in my life. I have been contemplating a move to Hawaii in the fall, after over 8 years in Seattle. There have been many things to confirm that this is the path that I should go down and with that in mind there are so many things that come to mind of things I need to do if I am to make that huge leap of faith.
I could bore you with my list of to-do's. Buy less/save more, work on resume, sell/donate unnecessary belongs, etc. But those are just the things that will make the logistics of this huge change/move more managable. What about the feelings that come to the surface? There are more than just clothes, books and kitchen gadgets to sort through. Seattle has been my home for close to a decade now. The friends that I have made here have become my family. I have put down significant roots in this town and it may be hard to uproot them. But in spite of any heartache there is also great excitement and joy at the possibilities that lay ahead. Something tells me there will be many more posts on this topic this year.
So Happy New Year friends! I am hopeful that it will be rich year for us all.
I could bore you with my list of to-do's. Buy less/save more, work on resume, sell/donate unnecessary belongs, etc. But those are just the things that will make the logistics of this huge change/move more managable. What about the feelings that come to the surface? There are more than just clothes, books and kitchen gadgets to sort through. Seattle has been my home for close to a decade now. The friends that I have made here have become my family. I have put down significant roots in this town and it may be hard to uproot them. But in spite of any heartache there is also great excitement and joy at the possibilities that lay ahead. Something tells me there will be many more posts on this topic this year.
So Happy New Year friends! I am hopeful that it will be rich year for us all.
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